Monday, June 19, 2017

What Do I Want To Look Like?


I discovered a new-to-me  fashion blog the other day, Brenda Kinsel. I loved the philosophy of this lady and enjoyed perusing her blog and reading what she had to say. 

In one of her post she posed a question that she felt many women have, or at least need to ask themselves,

"What do I want to look like?"

It sounds like a pretty simple question when you look at it for face value, but if you start thinking about it, it becomes a bit deeper.

 Of course our first answer will be about our weight, our age, our shape, our height, but I am talking about what do you want to look at right now, where you are age or weight does not count. We must always strive to look the best we can.

I have always said there is nothing worse than feeling over weight and frumpy.

We have all had this question at different times in our lives. I was talking to someone in her early 40's recently and she was starting to address this question.

20' and 30's

Over the decades I remember thinking about this question especially in my 30's when we all still have our cute figures and great skin, but we realize we are no longer teenagers of even in our 20s any more and feel the push and pull of how to dress like a grown-up without looking like our Mom's or worse yet Nana's even though I am a very proud Grammy.

 The 40's and 50's

By time I was in my 40s I felt confident of who I was and how I wanted to look, but then the 50's came and lovely menopause, which without me realizing it changed my mood, my body, and perception of who I was, and how I wanted to look.

I would not call any of these identity crisis, but it might be considered a wardrobe crisis. Here I am in my late 60's, which just blows my mind. and I am in the decision mode again.

"What do I want to look like!?"

It is helpful when you find a stylish lady that writes a fashion blog that has the same taste in clothing as you do, but personally I really don't find many that seem to have my same aesthetics.

Sometimes it is not that we don't know our style, but we just can't find it out in the market place anymore.

 Sure we can find just about anything if price is no object, but let's face it, for most of us, price is an object that we have to be concerned about.

I have deemed my style as a grown-up-classic- preppy style . I love classic clothing with pretty silhouettes. 

 Color is my friend and I wear it often. 

My favorite prints are gingham and stripes in the winter I love a good plaid. If I find a shoe with a tassel on it I am a happy girl and that was before tassels became on trend. Sometimes I feel as if I should have been born on the east coast as far as design and my dress. People that know me have actually told me that.

Finding "YOUR" Style

Finding one's own style is not an easy job especially when the media seems to dictate so much of what we should and should not wear.

 What I loved about Brenda Kinsel's blog was how she works with her clients as a stylist to find out what works for them, and even pushes them gently out of their comfort zone to try new and different things.

I don't necessarily dress like Brenda, she has her very own style, but I do agree with her approach to dressing and the way she thinks.

Know Your Silhouette!

As far as shapes, colors and patterns I am very set on those. Where I have issues is finding them in the market place when so much of what is out there is, well, shall I say,  NOT me!!

I am not Bohemian, nor do I want to bare my shoulders and let's face it that is what is in vogue this season.  

In trying to find what works for us we must be brutally honest with ourselves. I have some personal guidelines for myself that I have found to be helpful over the years.......

1. If I wore it the last time it was in style, I probably should not be wearing it this go around. We all know what goes around comes around again in fashion and decor for that matter. 

For instance right now the styles are so reminiscent of the 70-80s. I was in my 20's and 30s so I should not be wearing what I wore back then and to be honest those two decades were hard for me to find styles I liked.

2. Stay in tuned to your body shape and what silhouette looks best on you. I have an hour glass shape and the big billowy tops that are so on trend right now are not the right shape for me. 

I need tops that follow the lines of  my upper silhouette more closely. I have, shall we say, sturdy legs, so if I wear a billowy top I become shapeless and can visually gain 10 lbs, not good for someone who is already over weight.

3. Try new things when trying on clothing. I read once to try at least 6 pieces that you would never think would look good on you. You might be surprised. Trust me I have had some good private laughs in dressing rooms doing this and once in awhile there is a surprise, but at this point in my life I am pretty in tuned with what works for my body.

4. Just because it is in style NOW does not mean you have to wear it.

5. If you are wearing on-trend pieces make sure you are not wearing them head to toe, making you look like Trendzilla! You don't want to look like you are trying too hard.

6. When wearing a statement piece make sure it is the star, do not wear several statement pieces at a time. For instance if I am wearing a statement necklace I will keep my ensemble more reserved and classic.

7. Don't be afraid of color wear it boldly and proudly. I do wear color and mix it up all the time. Color makes me happy.

8. Wear a color close to my face that you know is a good color for you. We all have colors that we love and that we get compliments on. Those are YOUR colors wear them proudly and close to your face. White or cream will always brighten up your face as well.

9. Your best accessory is always going to be a smile, it beats out any accessory or makeup.

10. Be who you are, no one can do it better than YOU! Be the best YOU where you are right now!!!

Be sure and go over to Brenda's blog and read some of her post, she recently did two post on 10 Fashion tips for women over 60. I found them helpful for women of all ages.

Saturday, June 17, 2017

My Dad

 I wrote this four years ago and nothing has changed about how I feel about my Dad, nor will it...........

My Dad! I can hardly think of him without getting big tears in my eyes. He is no longer with us, he died at a very young age (47). The tears I shed are sometimes for sadness, but other times for joy.

He was a man among men as far as I was concerned. We were raised to pretty much think he could walk on water. 

I actually thought I was going to marry him until I turned 10yrs old, and I found out that was not done.

On my actual wedding day after he walked me down the aisle he sat down, and took out his hanky and boo-hooed, my Mom had to console him.

Here we go!! 001 (509x800) 
I wish the pictures were in color, he had the most amazing sparkly blue eyes.

I remember how hard my Dad worked and what a wonderful provider he was for his family.What I remember above all was how much he loved his family. 

Daddy spoke with his eyes, they could laugh without making a sound. He had the most beautiful twinkly blue eyes.

I would love to watch my Dad look at my Mom, and her look back at him. Not a word was spoken, but you knew without a doubt  they loved each other. 

That gives a child so much security to see how their parents love each other and boy did my parents love each other.

My Dad made me feel loved, and protected. I knew Daddy would fix it if anything would go wrong. I knew I was beautiful in his eyes.

Daddy @ wedding 001 (682x800) 
He put a penny in my shoe and helped me with my garter.

I remember when my oldest son had his daughter (who is the most precious little girl alive) I watched as he leaned over the isolette, and he bowed his head. 

I asked him later was he praying, and he told me , “I am a blessed man, I was thanking God!" I knew then and there that he was going to love his little girl just like my Dad loved me.

I told my son that day.....  

"You know you will be her first mirror. She will see herself through your eyes." 

Now how did I know that? Because I saw myself through my Dads eyes. I knew I was worth loving because he showed me unconditional love. 

So when it came time to choose a husband I knew without a doubt that I had  met the right one. 

We have been married over forty three years now. I fell in love with him when I was only sixteen yrs old so I have loved him for 47 years.

So you see because my Dad loved me like no one else could, and took such wonderful care of me, I have learned to expect the best in a man. 

In my opinion I got the best in the man that I have been married to for 43 years.

I guess in my heart I will always be Daddy’s little girl, I kind of like that. 

Even though he is no longer here to give me hugs he is with me in spirit, and his love will be with me forever. That is what I call a wonderful example of a Dad!!

 "Enjoy the Process" Of:
Telling the Dad's in your life  how special they are to YOU!!

Happy Father's Day to all the Dad's in My Life!!


Thursday, June 15, 2017

My Daily Skincare Routine

 Finding the perfect skincare regime takes a lot of trial and error. Personally if it doesn't show some almost instant gratification I usually will toss it. However this last October I started a new regime after doing a lot of research and reading on this method.

My skin is aging, after all why wouldn't it, I AM!!! Seriously we can't stop the aging process but we can delay some of the results if we find the right products that work for our skin types.

Today I am going to show you what I use and what is working for me. I am using the Korean skincare method and products.

My morning routine starts with this....

This is an oil cleanser that goes on as a balm and when you add water you get a nice creamy like foam. I love this stuff and it is on sale right now. They have one for all skin types. The oil helps dissolve any oil or sebum on our skin. I read that somewhere!!

This is not a Korean product but it uses natural products and I love it. The smell alone would make me use this but it also cleanses my skin and leaves it very soft. In fact I just purchased 2 bottles for under $15 on Amazon as I am writing this!!

I never used toners before because they always seemed to have alcohol and dried my already dry skin out. I kept reading how important it was to use them to balance the ph of the skin so your skin would absorb the nutrients you are applying. Since I was so happy with the Korean products I asked for a suggestion for my skin type which tends to be dry and can be sensitive at times.

There is nothing in this that will ever dry out your skin. It has Royal jelly and honey among other natural, botanical extracts deliver nutrition to the skin.

My friends that have tried this are SOLD on it and say it is their favorite product. I have to admit it is up there on my list but I have a favorite and it was actually the very first product in the Korean skincare product line.

This is an essence. According to what I have read it is another preparation product for the skin to recieve the nutrients, plus it also has nutrients in it. I love the way it makes my skin feel and the fragrance is so fresh. I think I could drink this stuff it smells so delicious.

 You only use a few drops in the palm of your head and then gently tap it into the skin. I don't know what it is about this one product that feels so decadent and luxurious to my skin. It is like I gave my skin a big drink of clear mountain spring water. Can you tell I love it!? Plus I think it really adds to the moisture and glow of my skin and lets face it we all want that youthful  glow we once had.

It also comes in a travel size if you want to just try it first without getting the large bottle.

At first this kind of grossed me out, but after reading more and more about it, I had to give it a try and I am glad I did. I am about to reorder this again. 

This can be used as a moisturizer but I use it under my moisturizer. This truly makes my skin softer and more subtle and I think it has diminished fine lines. In fact my hairdresser asked me what was I using on my skin because she noticed a huge difference in how healthy and moist my skin looked!!

This product is an all natural product not Korean and I love it. I have very sensitive eyes and find it hard to find an eye cream that does not make my eyes weep. This does NOT make my eyes weep and it has caffeine in it which takes away puffiness and dark circles. This has been another repeat purchase for me.

Lastly is the moisturizer that I swear by and so do my friends that have tried it. You can actually see little beads of moisture on your skin when you first apply it. It does what a moisture cream should do and it is so inexpensive. I will have to admit because of the pricing I thought it could not be that good. Boy was I wrong, it is great and I am on my second bottle.

Lastly I use a sunscreen when I am going out.

Best sunscreen I have ever used on my face, light weight, light pleasant fragrance SPF 50/PA+++
 powerful broad spectrum UVA/UVB protection

I have never been a very faithful skincare gal other than cleansing and moisturizing, but I have to admit these steps feel so decadent and luxurious I actually look forward to using them. I have a few serums that I have tried and added to my routine and also some night time products. I will do a post on those later. None of these products are overly expensive and they last a good 6 months or more.

I never recommend anything that I have not found to be tried and true. I do try different products from time to time, but all of the above have been with me since October and I have repurchased most of them and will continue to use them.

WE can all learn from each other so leave a comment and tell us what you are using that has worked well for you!!! After all we are in this together ladies, lets be supportive!!! 

These are the two sites I have ordered from and have been very happy with customer service and products.......

PEACH AND LILY Use this code and get a discount ... 


Tuesday, June 13, 2017

Shopping And Decorating With Your New Purchases!


It's all about style — in the home and in the closet.:

Before I begin this post I have to say this is my opinion, it is not in cement. I realize that all design is subjective. I am only here to give you guidance, and you can take what I have to say for what it is worth to you.

This post is not to make you afraid to ever buy anything again, but to empower you to be more selective and to curate your purchases beautifully in your homes.

J.K. Kling Associates:



If you have been following my blog for awhile you have noticed I tend to be a less is more gal. Not a minimalist, but I like my home to feel open and airy, and especially uncluttered.

Clutter tends to make me feel nervous inside and I strive for a calm, peaceful atmosphere to surround me. In fact that is one of the compliments I love the most when someone offers up a compliment about my home.
 Elegant Coastal Cottage:

While I was shopping in Homegoods the other day I took a look in several ladies carts and wanted so badly to help them out. They had sooooo many little this and that's and pillows and wall hangings in their carts, and none of good design or quality.


You name it they had it in their cart, BUT then I looked at their faces, they were grinning from ear to ear. 

What they had in their carts made them happy, and after all isn't that what decorating our homes is  all about, to make us, and those who enter our homes, happy and content. 

I only hope they were happy when they went home and tried to place all their new purchases in their rooms. I had my doubts.

I am only telling you this because I am about to tell you WHY your carts should not be full of this and that, nor your homes.

If you are still with me and have read the above and looked at the pictures I chose to show  well curated rooms then let's begin......


First I have to tell you not every table, or wall HAS to have something on it!! I use to tell my clients, if you want someone to stop and look at that wall, put something on it. However if you want them to pass by, DON'T !!!! This is a good guideline for hallways or areas you just pass by.

Remember the eye needs a place to rest in every room!!


Interior Design Ideas:

A good guideline is to choose one focal point in your room, and maybe two supporting areas as well to address. 

I like to think of your room as a stage with actors and there should be one star and a couple of supporting actors.

beautifully styled bookcase:
Most rooms have a natural focal point, a main wall, fireplace, or a bank of lovely windows. If your room has neither, notice the main wall you view as you enter the room, you can mark that as your focal wall.

#3 Choose larger elements

The table and its whole setup would be perfect in my home, everything works and fits in to the design I am going for!!!:

Try to choose larger pieces to decorate with and only a few smaller elements. If you have a bunch of smalls they get lost on stage and no one even notices them

 When adding elements to your room always start with your base pieces first, furniture, lighting, artwork. 

 After the main pieces are placed add your larger accessories first, then fill in with the smalls, wherever you need a touch of interest such as texture, or color.

Jessie D Miller Portrait

There will be many that will disagree with me on this count and this is something that is not in cement so take it for what it is worth......

 I have found for me personally, that if I am attracted to something I have to be able to place it somewhere in my home in my minds eye. If I can not think of where I will use it, then I do NOT purchase it.

 design indulgence: MY KITCHEN:

That does not mean I don't have extra accessories in my cabinets and garage, trust me I do. However, I do NOT put them all out at one time. I rotate my accessories. In fact I just did that when I brought out my summer pillows and accessories.

I find that if you purchase something you will feel compelled to put it out in your room whether it adds a cluttered look or not.  

WE all have to justify our purchases to ourselves, and others if we live with someone that has us on a budget, if you know what I mean!!

 #5 Make sure you vary your textures in your rooms.

Every well decorated room will have a variation of textures in the room. By textures I mean elements that have smooth, shiny or rough textures.

 The First Step To Take Before Decorating Your Home!:

Sometimes you will see a pretty room and you know it is pretty but it is lacking something and you can not pinpoint what the problem is. 9 out of 10 times it is lack of textures so keep that in mind when you do your accessorizing.

I have found it helpful to make a list of elements that can add textures to my rooms that I will like.  
This is an area where I see people adding more and more elements of the same textures because they sense that their room needs something. When in fact it is not that it needs more, it just needs different.

#6 Make sure you allow for enough lighting in your rooms and buy the correct size.


I would say 8 out of 10 rooms are lacking the proper lighting. Make sure you have overhead, wall and surface lighting in your rooms. 

If you have table lamps make sure they are large enough. I so often see lamps that are way too small for a table or a room. There is nothing that can cheapen the look of your room more than poor  lighting that is also the wrong proportion for the room.

 (Just click on the above sentence to go to article.) 

I see so many people choose the candlestick lighting as a table lamp and it is just too small, those need to be on the ends of a mantle or narrow console table, not on a table by a reading chair. Just keep that in mind next time you need a new lamp or see a bargain. Pass it up!! It is not a bargain if it makes your room look like there is no rhyme or reason to it.

Another thing to think about when adding any lighting to your room, whenever possible have all lights on dimmer switches.

Here is a little formula to know how much lighting to add to your size of room.....

#7 When making new purchases for your room choose the least available element first.

This probably sounds a bit confusing, let me give you a for instance. If you want a colorful or patterned rug in your room choose it first. There will be less rugs that you will like than maybe a sofa or chair. Of course this is just a guideline, each room will dictate what is needed first.

 nice 99 Gorgeous Coastal Living Room Decorating Ideas

Let's just say choose the most patterned, colorful piece of furniture, or rug first and work the other elements around that. You can always add solids or neutrals in the other pieces.


Gold gives spa blue a cozy, warmth:

This is the one area that a lot of people want to start with first and then work their room around a wall color. 
Don't do it!! 

Let's use a bedroom as our example. Many people change out there bed coverings more often than any other change in their home. It is the least expensive area to change and it truly makes a huge change. Let's face it, our beds take up most of the space in our bedrooms so whatever we put on them to dress them up says a lot!!!

Dark walls and dusty pink are a perfect combo in this romantic bedroom.:

You should choose your bed coverings first!! The paint world is a bottomless pit and you can always have a custom color mixed so the colors to choose from are endless.

#9 Keep your collections together

LEOPARD PILLOWS, SPOOL CHAIRS AND BLUE AND WHITE PORCELAIN. VT Interiors - Library of Inspirational Images: just a very pretty shop:

If you have a collection of pictures, or even special figurines, or any collection for that matter, group them together, DO NOT scatter them around the room.
#10 Buyer Beware!! 

 Have you ever been in a  room that looks as if there should be price tags on all the elements they have sitting around. 

I am not talking about true antiques or genuine collections, but I am referring to the obvious new purchased items that are sitting everywhere.

Since we all have a local Homegoods stores around us it is a real pitfall to go there and fill our carts up with lots and lots of goodies. Don't do it! You don't want your home to look as if everything came from Homegoods. 

Be selective and make your purchases carefully, making sure they fit into your home and add to the richness of the room. 


Step back and evaluate your room ask yourself a few questions....

  • Does this room reflect ME?
  • Do I LOVE this room?
  • Does my room look like a boutique rather than a home?
  • Does my eye flow gently around the room without any jolts on the eye due to  use of colors or elements
  • Does this room say Welcome Home?
  • How does this room make me feel happy, content, relaxed?
  • Does this room have character and a story it could tell?

Remember these are only guidelines that I have learned in my years of working with clients and issues I ran across many, many times.