Sunday, September 22, 2013

An Important Lesson I Have To Share With YOU!!

   

Life teaches us many lessons!  I try to be a student of life, so when I learn a lesson I like to share it with people I care about. 

Recently something has come to my attention more than a few times. Since it keeps showing itself to me, I feel compelled to share it with YOU my dear readers.

I believe we are all connected in some way, or another. I also believe that people are brought into our lives for a variety of reasons, but none just happen to be by chance. We can all learn from each other…

every one you meet is important

Even in blogland we will have the chance to meet others virtually if not in person, and they will have experiences that we can learn from.

Blogland can be a very fickle place, and to be honest I still do not quite get the pulse of things, but I have noticed something that has bothered me for quite awhile now.

I see people trying to become something they are not in order to promote their blog. I have to talk to myself all the time to not get caught up in the politics of blogland.

You see when I started my blog, I did it as a creative outlet, and a means to teach some of the design lessons I had learned in my professional life as a designer. 

I love design, and have a real passion for it. So much so, that even I think I can be a bit obsessed at times.

Blogging was a way to continue feeding this passion of mine. Sadly, sometimes it has also almost killed this passion. Not by anyone’s hand but my own.

The lesson I am learning is you MUST stay true to yourself.

If you gain fame, and lose yourself you have gained nothing. 

I have seen followers come, and go on my blog, and that is just the way it goes in blogland.

But, something I have observed not particularly on my little blog, but in blogland in general, is that you are only as famous as your best, last post.(sounds like Hollywood and movies, doesn’t it?)

Be yourself saying

Readers will swarm to be next to you when you are in the limelight, but as soon as they see it does not benefit their own goals, or ambitions they move on.

I know we have all felt the sting of this in our own lives, and in blogland.

I find this very sad, and so shallow to be honest. I like to think I personally have more substance than this. 

Dignity/Destiny

I  am thankful to say that I also have many friends that have remained throughout the thick and thin of it all.

They seem to get what is truly important in life, relationships vs. fame.

You might not become famous, or in the spotlight by associating with me, but I will guarantee you will have a true friend, one that cares, and tries to reach out when the need is there.

This post will probably not sit well with many, but I am sure there are those that have felt the cruelness of blogland, and felt as if they might be alone in these feeling.

I am here to tell you, as in the real world, blogland can be just as cruel.

Because of this stay faithful to yourself, and to the friends that have been with you from the beginning. Never treat people as stepping stones to take in order to get you where you want to be.

Design is still a passion of mine, and I will continue to write as long as there are readers that let me know they are benefiting from what I write. I want to maintain my passion, and joy that design has given me.

I am thankful to all of YOU who remain faithful in your reading, and commenting, and will try to never take you for granted.

Hopefully I can continue…..

“Enjoying The Process!” Of:

The Good Life Of Design

 
 

36 comments:

marty (A Stroll Thru Life) said...

Such an honest and heartfelt post. YOu are such a precious person and I love being able to call you a real friend. I always enjoy your posts and the fact that you share you design knowledge and expertise with us. A totally unselfish gift. Keep it up, I love it and you. Hugs, Marty

Elena said...

I have a glass of wine raised to toast you on this truthful post! Here's to keeping it real! Cheers!

Confessions of a Plate Addict said...

A very honest post, Kathysue! It's not easy to be true to yourself but in the end...that's what's important! Thanks for writing what is on your heart...hugs...Debbie

chisenfam said...

Truer words could not be spoken and not just in blog land, but also in everyday life. So many people running around trying to be someone they aren't, to be honest Im sure at some point n my life I was guilty of the same thing. You do however, at some point in your life, IF you are lucky realize what's important in this life. I am lucky enough to know you and I can say you are one of the most sincere people I've ever met.
Carol

Kat said...

Beautiful post, Kathysue. As Carol said, this is true in all facets of life, not just blogland. To thine own self be true. Words to live by. Love you, Kat

Stacey said...

This is a great post and will probably ring true more so with those of us who have blogged for awhile. I'll be honest...blogging seems like a contest to me now and it takes the fun out of it. I just love caring for my home, decorating, and cooking. Susan Branch calls it Home Arts. Blogging has always been a way to connect with others with the same loves. Why does it have to be a contest now? Am I the only one feeling that way?

Toy Carli said...

Your writing is telling. Personally, I love these three sentences: We are not in charge. Authenticity is a process. The ego is a hustler. I always need to remind myself that I am not in charge of anything or anyone, just me. I always need to remind myself to practice being an authentic person. And, I always need to work at identifying the ego in me and in others. It helps me to work it out, balance, and move on and not look back. Many people don't look within. You're a sweet person, Kathy Sue.

9405018--Pat said...

Great post today.Pat H

Loi Thai, Tone on Tone said...

Yes, indeed, Kathysue! So true. But I do love blogging, and like anything, it has its pros and cons. What I love most: connecting with others and learning from each other, as you stated. Glad to have you in blogland!
Cheers,
Loi

Loi Thai, Tone on Tone said...

PS - Happy 1st day of fall. I visited the pumpkin patch today :)

Pattie Douglas said...

Loved this post. I haven't blogged in a very long time but have a select few that I follow. Each one still has the "personality" that grabbed me from the start. I just detest the commercialization that has happened to many that I used to follow. Happens in real life too and I just wish i could say to heck with those individuals as easily!

Tote said...

Kathysue, such a heartfelt post. I have always read your blog, and enjoy it so much. I learn something new from you all the time. Thank you!

Susan

Patty Day @Pattys Epiphanies said...

Great Post from a Great Friend! You have always been there for me and I appreciate it so much.

Jemsmom said...

Well said! It has been an interesting ride for sure. I have sadly not posted very much at all lately, but it is my blog and I do what I can do. It is for me and my family so I can't let others get me down!! Thanks to you for always being so open and sharing!

stephanie at Stephanie Kraus Designs said...

Well-said. I'm sorry it sounds like you have had a bad experience and you are such a great person and have supported my little blog. So keep on keepin' on Kathysue. I love reading your blog and you have been such an inspiration. I too use my blog as a creative outlet for me and that's my only goal. xoxo

Karen Evans said...

We'll said Kathysue. One of the reasons that I stopped blogging was that I stopped feeling good about my decisions every time I didn't get positive feedback. Our homes (and our posts) need to represent who we are not who someone else wants us to be. I've always loved that you are always true to yourself. But I remain a follower because I see you as a role model. Promise you will never change!

Victoria said...

A very honest post, Kathysue, but I expect nothing less from you. I try to comment as often as possible to the blogs I read, if merely as an expression of appreciation for all the work that goes into writing a blog. What has happened to me, and I am sure to others, is as I find more and more blogs of interest, I have less and less time to respond. My new goal now is to pare them down to the ones I enjoy and relate to the most, otherwise I will never get out of my pajamas. Yours, of course, is among my top favorites, even when I don't always have the time to comment.
XOXO, Victoria

Merlin said...

It's all about choices isn't it..."my blogs" are my "morning coffee klatch" and inspire me almost every day. If it didn't I wouldn't. franki

Donnamae said...

What a great post Kathysue! I crave authenticity...in my daily life, in my friends, in my decorating, and in my blog reading. So, thank you for being authentic! ;)

The enchanted home said...

Bravo to you. Yes you nailed it with this post...I so agree its very important to be true to who you are. I have had a few interesting experiences(for lack of a better word) and would say 99% of the people out there are kind and well meaning but you do have that 1% and you need to just keep rolling and ignore the bad karma. But having a true and authentic voice as you said is the most important thing of all.

If you are not passionate about what you are doing...then it will eventually lose its lustre and fade away as fast as it came. Great topic!

Linda Hartong said...

I hear you. If I blog for my pleasure and to learn something then I am happy. The minute I count stats and comments, I am merely seeking approval. This also happed on flickr. The positive feedback becomes addictive.
Glad you took time to address this issue. Well said.

Teresa at Splendid Sass said...

Totally agree, and I treasure your friendship, Kathysue!! I enjoy and learn here, so not going anywhere!
Happy Monday.
Teresa
xoxo

Linen Towel Giveaway!

Kathysue said...

Sweet Stephanie,
Actually I have not had a bad experience because I have been on guard about the pitfalls of blogging. I never want to give up my passion for numbers or even approval. I love to design and write about my experiences. I have just seen more and more of the bloggers that I have known over the last 5 years go astray in order to gain popularity. Some have gained higher numbers and followers, but in my estimation they have lost so much more in losing the joy and who they are because of it. I don't think anything or anyone is worth that. I am old enough to have pretty tough skin at this point, but felt compelled to write about this in order to draw attention to the subject in hopes that it could help someone else find their way back to being their authentic self and regain their passion.

Elizabeth Day said...

When I started my blog a couple years ago, my husband asked me for whom I would be writing. After thinking about this a little while, I replied, "Me!" And that's the way I have tried to address every post I've made. I pray that God may use what I post as He chooses and if it by any chance blesses or informs, or encourages any one else, then its because of His Holy Spirit working through that person's heart after having blessed what I put in writing. There is no other purpose.

You have never been anything but positive and uplifting on your blog and I so appreciate you for that. I have no idea what might have happened to cause you to write this post, but I thank you for again, beautifully and positively expressing your feelings.

May God continue to bless your creativity and desire to inspire us to make our homes a more inviting and welcoming place in which to live.

Diane Haynie said...

Kathysue

Sounds like you have had a run-in with some of the "bad" guys out there in blogland and for that I am sorry. I have followed you almost from the beginning and enjoy your insight and can feel you genuine passion for this thing we call design.

I have a small blog and have been able to avoid the nasties out there but I have also seen some bloggers I enjoyed become way too busy to remember the wee folk that were there in the beginning but c'est la vie. Thanks for opening up your heart and sharing your experiences.

The Buzz Blog said...

Well said, Kathysue! We're in the same boat as you - we blog because we love design and use our posts as another creative outlet. We used to be obsessed by our Feedburner numbers and now we rarely look at them. Since we're not trying to earn our living with our words (thank goodness!) we'd rather have tried and true readers with something to say than a big audience who skims our blogs. Thank you for your thoughtful post!
xxoo
C + C

Jo Ann said...

I love how real you and your blog are!! I like that it's not loaded in advertising, I understand a lot of bloggers are doing this as their livelihoods and I definately don't begrudge them that but some are just overwhelming and too distracting to read. I started a blog about a year ago, I wrote 2 posts but had no camera..thought I'd back and add some pics. However, I started reading more and more blogs and decided I was in over my head! It did look like a competition, so I read instead. So many things I dont get..like I think its called trundication (?) I get no one wants their work stolen but with their name all over posts and pics is that still a big concern? Maybe it is but sometimes its seems like it may be for "numbers" I'm sure there are people that won't like this comment but these are things I've wondered about and just don't know. Anyway, again I love how real your blog is. I really enjoy it!!

Anne said...

Very good things to point out about the pitfalls of blogging, KathySue.

I have been burned as well over the years, and found it quite the learning experience.

Now I know that the price of popularity is exhaustion and pressure (got to keep up writing those daily posts! Got to comment on every single new blog post from every bog! Always have to sugar coat the truth so that people don't think I have lingering angry or depressed or bitter moods - always have to find the silver lining in the clouds!

Being "me" gives me an outlet for how I feel, and allows me the freedom of only writing when I want to.
It means I can be real.
Not as many people may 'like' me, and regardless, I like myself better and am more at peace.

Sure, I miss getting 75 comments on every post. It was great for my ego.
But my genuine friends have stayed through me all this time - about five out of the seventy five.
And they are precious.

Thank you for writing your post. It was perfect timing.

Julie Taylor and Danni Greenwalt said...

Kathysue...you are one person in blog-land that I'm glad I have gotten to know....always enjoy visiting your blog!

Delores Arabian said...

Great post. I hear ya! Check your email for a more elaborate comment from yours truly! ~Delores
PS: Thanks for being my bloggy friend, even if I don't comment as much as I used to.

Melinda said...

All wonderful and meaningful lessons - thank you for sharing.

Acanthus and Acorn said...

Kathysue,
After a very long bloggy break this was a wonderful post to read! I've been dropped by many who I'm sure perceive themselves as important or famous (LOL) and often times I'll simply return the favor as one only has a set amount of time each day to blog, work and enjoy friends and family. It was fascinating to me that during my break I did think about a some of my fellow bloggers and they were all the ones I've had behind the scenes correspondence with over the years- I think thats only natural to think of and visit those you feel connected with on some level.
xo,
~R

The Pink Pagoda said...

So thought provoking, Kathysue. We've had a lot going on at home and I haven't been visiting blogs much lately. I'm glad I didn't miss this.

Grace @ Sense and Simplicity said...

I so agree. Your blog is one that I often learn new things from about the design process. Thanks for all you do.

SHERRY HART said...

Awwww girlfriend....I am so glad I started blogging just to meet some of the amazing people out there like you:) I hear what you are saying and it is hard not to want that approval but in the end you have to do it for yourself! Just have fun:)

Jaybird said...

I love your blog and this post is one of your all time best!! So many bloggers get caught up in the "keeping up with the Joneses" frame of mind. You started out to teach us something about design and every post has stayed true to that goal. I appreciate your time to post tools to help us with our own homes.
Many thanks and blessings to you,
J